Mailbag #55

"Can't Drive 55"

Nothing ruins your Sunday like dragging a bag of mail uphill.

(Toad wonders when the people of the Mushroom Kingdom will discover the ease of e-mail - Which incidentally has also become obsolete)

Hours of sorting & sifting (between several smoke & snack breaks) and this is what's in front of my screen:

Answers to a whopping nineteen messages! (None of which are likely to ever be read by the person who submitted the question)

Forgotten names, faces & fatalities...
Plus the age-old debate whether too much indulgence really can ruin your eyesight.

BUT DOES SHE SWALLOW? How did you feel when Microsoft got into the Video Game Industry, bought a bunch of video game developers/publishers and made their games exclusive to Xbox ie. Perfect Dark Zero? Suppose it was looking forward to seeing a new girl but she suddenly starts dating a billionaire. Had nothing invested in Perfect Dark Zero. (It's not like I had purchased a domain dedicated to the title) Bit stunned for a moment, I suppose. Fortunately, plenty of other girls (and games) to play with... (And not necessarily in that order).

TS2 "BETA" THEORY... There's this Action Replay code that gives you all Arcade Awards in TimeSplitters 2. It gives you 58 Awards. 57 being normal Awards, 1 being a beta Award. It's "Unlucky to Lose". My best guess why it was taken out is because (Note: This is just a guess) is that Free Radical Design wanted to there to be a Award you could get by winning a lot of matches, then losing a match. Maybe they couldn't decide on a number of matches so it was never added, but lt was still in memory. Oh, and yes. I'm a cheater. An interesting theory. Really can't find much more about it. Always fascinated with long-lost bits and unexplained trivia. Not sure if it was proven to be "beta" or not. "It reportedly has been attained in a Capture the Bag game lost badly." https://timesplitters.fandom.com/wiki/Arcade_Awards.

BACKHAND SMASH... Why don't you ever mention N64 Super Smash Bros? Half your pages are dedicated to the classics. When Super Smash Bros for Nintendo 64 was released, we were too busy playing the original Mario Party (a game that has also lived on as a clasic). With the games being released a month apart, I barely played the original Super Smash Bros myself - And there were SO many games coming out.   The original Super Smash Bros N64 could also have gotten a bit more hype... The game is barely noticeable on the cover of Nintendo Power magazine in favor of Beetle Adventure Racing. (April 1999 / Volume 119) Did enjoy Super Smash Bros during a weekend rental, but somehow never got hooked on the game. When Nintendo's next console (GameCube) was released, Super Smash Bros Melee was one of the early titles and I picked it up the same day I got that system.

FAR FROM PERFECT... Have you considered having a Perfect Dark special mailbag like the Goldeneye ones? The "Special GoldenEye Editions" of the Mailbag are always well received, and fun to put together. After finishing GoldenEye countless times, I was ridiculously familiar with the game. The Perfect Dark game feels much bigger to me - With so much more to explore. Played through Perfect Dark but only completed the game twice. There's genuinely stuff I've never seen, and stuff I've completely forgotten about. It's like being quizzed on an old movie that you only saw a couple times. Rough notes on various topics are progressively taking shape, so can't completely rule it out...

LINK TO THE PAST... I perfectly understand your position that you've moved on in life to do new things, but you'll always be known as Detstar to the people who have known you online. Over the years the gamesites put me in touch with so many brilliant people. Also took what I learned and applied it to so many other things. Gaming aside, have found that ALL my favorite hobbies connect with great people because they're just doing what they enjoy, sharing and interacting. I'll admit that I probably have too many hobbies - But that's not necessarily a bad thing. Have always bounced around, season to season, drifting in and out of my various sports and activities. Helps keep me balanced. I tend to go hardcore at something, exhaust all my ideas, and then move onto something else - Returning to those projects with renewed vigour. Even pro athletes get burnt out on their sports - Once upon a time, it was a game that they truly loved and enjoyed. But anything feels like work when you do it day in and day out, with no light at the end of the tunnel. Spending so much time writing about video games, also researching, reading (and occasionally responding to) e-mails that I wasn't even playing the actual games anymore.

DOUBLE AGENTS... Curious how did you hear about the beta version of GoldenEye? Pretty sure it was from a guy named Matt Beaman (creator of the fansite "Dr. Doak's GoldenEye Control Facility"). That was sometime around 1999. Apparently Matt was contacted by someone who worked on the game... Naturally I was skeptical - But he came out with a whole bunch of little details that I don't believe anyone had ever noticed before, at that point in time.

HITTING THE TWINE... What happened to the TWINE website (The World is Not Enough)? The webpages created for James Bond shooter The World is Not Enough on Nintendo 64 ran into technical difficulties (a very common theme). Would have taken too much time to not only find a new server, re-upload the files and update the new links. (Kinda like what would eventually happen with the Perfect Dark site...) As a result, the TWINE 64 website didn't make the jump when the other gamesites made the first big move to the same server. Briefly enjoyed The World Is Not Enough - But not enough to obsessiely keep playing like GoldenEye and Perfect Dark. Since then, the online world has grown immensely. Back in 1999, a couple megabytes of storage space would get instantly gobbled up with all the cool Bond stuff you want to fill it with.

HARVEST A SOUL... I'm going to assume that you had a fatal heart attack or some other unfortunate fatality. May God have mercy on your soul. Most fatalities are unfortunate (except in Mortal Kombat when it's downright hilarious). Appreciate your concern, but I already traded my soul for one of those "limited edition beta GoldenEye cartridges".

DIGITAL DELINQUENCY... Remember when you used to do mailbags? I mean, instead of amateur drawings of almost-porn? Yup, those were the good old days... Had to spend some serious time with my sketchpad - As far away from a keyboard as possible. Managed to recoup most of my sanity... (Still missing a few marbles, but most of the bag is there) Here's another favorite quote: "What's the difference between art and pornography? A Government grant!" -Family Guy (Season 1, Episode 4)

IT'LL RUIN YOUR EYES... I kind of stumbled upon your site back in the "heyday" when it was a bundle of game sites that were just loaded with sweet info (particularity the Perfect Dark and Smash Bros sites). But, perchance, could you upload the graphics (the posters and such) in a higher resolution? They're cool, but would look great in a higher rez. Anyway, in short, thanks for making such an enjoyable comic and thanks for the good times we had with the games. Bravo man... I know, so many things needing our time away from stuff we would rather be doing. Social obligations, work, significant other(s), etc. The Pete and/or Candi stuff especially would look good in higher resolutions. Also, out of curiosity, have you changed art styles recently? It seems that the Candi and Skye designs have changed a bunch in the last month or so. Not from the originals, but like from week to week it seems like your experimenting. Not that that is a bad thing, just curious if your exercising your Creative Biceps. Experimenting with different looks for the girls helps keep me amused, because every episode can start to feel the same after a while. So yeah, I'm definitely testing out my "Creative Biceps" as you put it.

CRAZY HANDS... Your TS2 strategy guide for the "Can't Handle This" mission helped me ALOT. Those hands really can be a pain in the wrist - it was impossible for me to get those damn 40 kills that I pretty much gave up playing the game for a month or so. The first time that I did manage to complete this mission was with your guide, and strangely enough I got a gold for it too, hehe =P A very frantic AND memorable battle, that's for sure. In Tony's Nightclub during prohibition, of all places. Takes a sober & steady hand to whack 'em all. (If your adrenaline doesn't get pumping then you're legally dead) The quirky characters just add to the insanity. So difficult that I figured a few tips would be welcome.

AUDIO PHILE... Hey Det, what's your favorite GoldenEye level music? Possibly Frigate or Silo. Least favorite Goldeneye Level? Depends. If it's a straight up, regular mission based on difficulty, I'd say the Caverns - But it's fun with Cheats. Also kinda dislike the Jungle. Kind of a long mission, and visibility isn't good. Surface 2 is kinda dull. Don't necissarily hate it or anything, but it's one of the levels I've played the least.

BOND BEATS... Hey, I saw someone asking about a soundtrack for Goldeneye. There is indeed one at Goldeneye Forever at the bottom of the main page. It was made by Krijy and there is a funky version as well. Thank you for your time! Still like the GoldenEye music... Appreciated it even more after I found myself playing without sound. (something which seems to either heighten or mess with your senses)

SLAVE LABOR GRAPHIC... Remember reading something about writing pages and I was wondering exactly how do you hire? FYI: It actually costs you money to work here. Anyone who gets "picked" will be suddenly abducted and put through "the trials". Imagine you suddenly find yourself grabbed, blindfolded, stuffed into a van, and taken somewhere to complete a set of absurd challenges (kinda like the movie "Old School"). If you survive the "elimination round", you may even find yourself stumbling around (wondering how the hell you got your pants off with your shoes tied together)... With all those distractions, surely you'll be completely unable to pick out the single "mistake" on this Super Mario chart. It's not a glaring error - Just technically incorrect. HINT: It's in the Super Mario Bros 3 sequence. ANSWER: (scroll & highlight the hidden text below) THE "HAMMER" DEPICTED IN THE IMAGE ACTUALLY BASHES ROCKS ON THE MAP. ONLY A "HAMMER BROTHER" SUIT WILL TURN MARIO INTO HAMMER BROTHER MARIO. PURPLE MONKEY DISHWASHER

LOST IN TRANSLATION... I found the translations for Roy in Super Smash Bros Melee. I give you these to satisfy anybody elses curiosity. Victory pose tranlations for Roy: "Mamoru dekimono-no tame-ni, makerarenai!" -"For those who I protect, I mustn't lose!"- "Kurushii tatakai datta." -"It was a tough battle."- "Shin-no tatakai-wa....korekare da!" -"The true battle....starts here!"- "Boku wa makenai." -"I wont lose."- Sounds so much more badass in Japanese... Must lose something in translation.

SHARK HUNTER... I just bought Gameshark, but can it ruin your game? Or is it safe. And another question I had is can you take off the things that you do in gameshark... Or do they stay forever? That's what I mean by "Can it ruin the game"? A video game is just a computer program that follows a set of instructions. Which level to load, how much health you have, your starting position, and countless other variables. The 'Shark enables you to bend the rules - Kinda like The Matrix. Want to use moonjump codes to fly over a level and look down at it? Give Bond a PP7 that shoots laserbeams? Play a mission as Alec Trevelyan? Explore the Citadel or look at the old James Bond photos? Once you take away the Gameshark, everything goes back to normal - Except any impossible feats you may have accomplished while using the 'Cheat' device... At any time, it's never a good idea to pull the game out of the system when it's powered on - Especially if the game may be in process of saving data.

OLD HAUNTS... What happened to smokecloud75? Second question is about Perfect Dark. What's this I hear about a "ghost"? I think its really there! It has happened to me, and I swear on a stack of bibles. I was just walking around the second datadyne level, when I heard a scream from inside the isotope room. How? Guards avoid that room like the plague...and when I searched with a camspy...no body. Freaked me out, to say the least. The last question is about Goldeneye. A lot of people may say this is a crapload, but...has it occured to anyone that Rare programmed a bunch of the wierd stuff in the game on purpose? You know, just to drive people crazy because they can't seem to figure out why certain things are there? I think its possible. It has been proven that rare programmers have at least some sense of humor. "Happy now, karl?" -Accoch63   Really not sure what happened to smokecloud (aka stormcloud)... He made some really cool GoldenEye artwork (re-imagined as a NES shooter game) and was someone that I regularly chatted with long before the Perfect Dark pages existed. Some weird sounds coming out of Perfect Dark game cartridges, on occasion. The only explanation I can come up with, is if the Game Pak isn't inserted 100% of the way into the system. Not that it's an invitation to start doing that on purpose... As for the GoldenEye text, apparently it was an inside joke connected to the No Radar (Multi) Cheat... Karl Hilton [of Rareware's GoldenEye Team] disliked the radar in Multiplayer, and cheekily the text "Happy now, karl?" would flash on screen to indicate that the cheat was activated. It's never seen while playing the game normally... But it was something that most people managed to spot while they were dilligently scrolling through the text in hopes of finding something interesting, and potentially connected to "beta GoldenEye"...

COMMUNITY SPIRIT... Remembering DSF (Detstar Forums), and the movies, games, events, jokes, and other stuff that used to be a part of our lives back then. It's great, it's fun, and it provides freedom for us and our content, but let's face it - who else besides us is going to be interested in what we did over the weekend or what our favorite games are? I think DSF was possibly one of the greatest underground internet communities while it was around. Variety of people, ideas, and interests. Also wanted to tell you just in general; you have a great site. Naturally it isn't perfect, but it (had) a lot of good and useful content, written by a variety of people. The task of creating a website is no easy task as many of us have come to understand; there's so much that goes into thinking of content, getting the motivation to do it, and then weeding out all the technical issues. That's why I personally congratulate you on your website. It's amazing that a single person could have had the inspiration to create so much. Which brings me to my next thought: Even though DSF may not be around anymore, it was still there, and if it weren't for the gaming website, I wouldn't met a lot of good friends, played any of the games I play, nor listen to any of the music I listen to now. So many things would be different. So, thanks a lot for providing me and I'm sure many others with the chance to meet each other over the internet and share ideas. -Kubata (Sito N.) What started out as a very small webspace to share GoldenEye strategies, Gameshark Codes and "beta" stuff eventually it snowballed into a megolithic monster that couldn't be housed. Glad that everyone had a blast with the community while it was there - Was too busy with the technical issues and administrative duties to actually "enjoy" the Forums towards the end. As annoying as the simple "free-hosted" days were, it was definitely more fun for me in the beginning. Thankfully Siberian Guard stepped up to become Forum Admin. He did remarkable things, especially with the Zelda Wind Waker pages. It was Members of the Forums that wanted to create a Zelda Windwaker Site. They basically wrote the guide and coded the whole thing, complete with an animated map. Back when social media was in its' infancy, things were accomplished via AOL Instant messenger, e-mail or posted on a messageboard.

BETA BOND & CITADEL... I was talking to a long time friend and he searched for Goldeneye 007... and there was a link on there about the Citadel being found (which is way cool by the way! I'm glad it was finally found!). Anyway, after browsing through your website I saw you used a lot of old BetaBond pictures.... and some of the captions on there... they could use to be corrected. I also noticed you left out some of my favorite pictures that I think you might enjoy. I'm not sure if I ever put them on BetaBond or not... but.. either way... if you'd like to take a walk down memory lane... Either way, it was a pleasure viewing all that old information. -Kypskywalk... or BetaBond Yet another gem of a message buried deep in the mailbox. That legendary beta|3ond website was something else. Truly an inspiration. -D

 Previous Mailbag #54: "Never Say Never Again"
(GoldenEye Special Edition)